responding to comments.

Friday, March 11, 2011

I got an email from a fellow book blogger the other day, and she was kindly telling me that she felt like I wasn't really interacting with those who follow and comment on my blog. She said she always used to comment here and ask me questions but I'd never respond so she said she decided to unfollow me. She also said that I should notice the lack of comments on my blog nowadays, and that she thinks the lack of interaction could be the reason.

My initial reaction was surprise of course. You know what they say; sometimes it's hard to see what you're doing until somebody points it out. So with her comment in my head, I re-read a lot of my older blog posts and such, and have been re-reading all of your comments. I notice that for the most part, I respond to all the comments, individually. However, there were some posts where I DIDN'T respond at all. It's pretty embarrassing also because some of these posts I "ignored" are discussion posts and such. So I just want you to know I do read every single comment that you give to my posts almost every day when I come home - sometimes even throughout the day through my phone. I always want to reply, and remind myself not to forget, but for some reason, I always do forget. I just want to write this post to say that I always, always want to respond, even if it is just a simple 'thank you.' Not because I have to, but because I do want to.

One of the reasons I loved blogging to begin with are the conversations and the responses that I get from people, and I love it so much when we interact back and forth. So this is just me trying to say that if I don't reply to you, believe me, it's not because I'm being a snob, an elitist, or am trying to ignore you. And I'm really sorry if you felt like that at all! I will try to change that and comment on a timely manner.

Please be patient with me everyone, and thank you so much. Blogging and interacting with you fellow book worms really does make me so happy and cheer me up when I need it most. I hope it does the same for you <3


  1. Wow that is harsh to be honest. See, there are some blogs out there that NEVER respond to comments, yet they get tons of them.

    I try to respond but sometimes I just can't cause the lack of time. I always feel bad when I can't respond but life sometimes takes over my time and I guess you are in the exact same situation.

    Seriously, I comment on a Blog when I have time or when there is a post that grabbed my eye. But I don't expect every blogger to respond to me... I understand they have a life besides blogging.

    Don't take it too serious!

    *hugs* and Happy Friday°!

  2. I'm horrible at responding to my own comments, to be honest. Don't be too hard on yourself - I think that for the most part people understand that we're all busy and we mean well. Personally, whenever I comment on a post, I don't even go back to see if I got a response. I think that the person e-mailing you may have gone a bit too far.

    Chin up. You have a great blog here. And by the way... you DON'T HAVE TO RESPOND TO THIS COMMENT :P

  3. Your definition of kindness is very kind indeed :) I would have been a bit ticked off if that kind of comment came my way. It's hard to keep up replies to comments when you get so many & want to, oh I don't know, read & review & live a life outside of blogging? I think you can only try your best and, as the saying goes, "to heck with the rest" :D

  4. It's so hard to keep up with comments, I hope you don't think we all feel that way. I enjoy your posts and when I comment I never expect a response. Keep on doing what you're doing and we'll be here!

  5. I feel ya. It takes time. But I've found it to be perhaps the most rewarding part of blogging. Great post.

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  7. Let me give you an example Jillian. Not too long ago I left up an open form for my readers to use to give me feedback on my blog. I got some super-sweet comments. I also got some negative feedback and although those sweet comments put a smile on my face, it was the negative comments that although made me sad, also left me in thought for a while.

    Recall heading over my blog one day, and seeing everything a little de-cluttered. New tabs at the sidebars. Reviews more thought out. More; well - written? I can be harsh so rather than dwell too long on their words I was able to appreciate their honesty.

    I realised from that moment that I had to do something that I had put of for too long. Get my blog together. Everything had become so "all over the place" that the idea of fixing this and that gave me a headache. Whereas after getting some of the feedback I didn’t even have to think twice about it. I worked on things that had been neglected for two years within days. It was hell and gruelling with a few sleepless nights, but I was so damn determined. So focused that it surprised me. I am naturally a very lazy person. All of a sudden though I was of my butt, and so passionate about doing this; doing something about it.

    I am so appreciative of their comments now; the form stays open even now so that if they have any concerns my readers can always hit me up. Let me know when I'm slipping up on something. I'll see an entry here and there and say aww or oh Oh my god they are so right! and head to the blog to do something about it.

    So you see girly, no matter how much it sucks getting that feedback, remember, she was a follower once. She must have felt pretty disconnected to feel that she had to unfollow. Hey I have had followers unfollow many times that have left me scratching my head thinking “why?” You just happen to have one that told you “why” I would take that than getting no explanation any day.

    Now that she has unfollowed, focus on your "followers" the good thing from this email is that she could be voicing the opinions of many of your readers who simply can't bring themselves to say it.

    I don’t check back to see if someone has replied to my comment when I comment on someones blog, unless it's a discussion post. I do however, notice when a person has multiple posts with comments but has not even left a quick comment from the blogger themselves saying at least that they appreciate the feedback. I notice that and it does come across as unappreciative, and I’m sure many others notice too.

    Don't be so hard on yourself though. We all do it at some point. It’s why I love Intense Debate so much despite it's glitches. It gives me the opportunity to reply individually to my readers and even at times leads to long conversations which are always welcomed.

    I know some bloggers are not open to personal posts. But if you are not replying to comments as much, and the reader’s feel they don't know what is going on with you then eventually they are bound to feel disconnected. It’s why if I feel that I haven’t had a good chat with my readers for some time, I’ll do a post be it small just to let them know I’m still here and update them on what is going on in life. Be brief if you like, but posts like that whether you realise or not, do connect you. They don't even have to comment on it, as long as they read it and know, that is fine with me.

    I hope you don’t take any of this to heart because personally? I have never had a problem with you or your blog. In fact, I pretty damn well adore you and your blog. I’m just trying to create some possible insight into where some readers might be coming from and thinking. Sorry for bombarding you with the essay :P

  8. I did notice you were chatting in the como-box less than when we met last year. I missed the chats but didn't take it personally, I figured you were busy with school ect.

    You are a sociable blogger so don't worry too much about it.

  9. No apologies needed. I know just what you mean about reading comments but sometimes forgetting to reply. That happens to me all the time. Its hard to reply to each and every comment. You've got a great blog, and I visit on the regular :)

  10. Danny - thanks for the support hun, happy friday too!

    Kelsey - Hahaha thank you! ;)

    Teacher/Learner - Haha "to the heck with the rest." Thank you :)

    Avid Reader - Thanks so much for the support.

    Juju - You always, always reply back and I love that about you and your blog, Juju :)

    Aly - Thanks so much for commenting with your 'essay.' I appreciate it a lot :) I do appreciate the book blogger for telling me her opinion and what she thinks, and it did made me realize what I've been doing - or haven't been doing.

    Lesa - Life outside of blogging just gets in the way, and I try to comment as much as possible. It's just sometimes hard to keep up.

    naida - Thank you so much. You have been one of the first followers here on the blog so I appreciate that you are still here! I notice you ALWAYS comment back and I do like that a lot too :)

  11. I think a lot of us understand this. Sometimes life just gets in the way or, like you said, you just don't realize that you're not commenting back as frequent as you used to.

    By the way, Aly's "essay" was fabulous!

  12. I think that sometimes people forget that we all have lives outside of our blog. I think you responded with class. Don't worry about responding to this message I wont take it personally. :)

  13. +JMJ+

    Yes, it was a harsh message--but as you pointed out, she was kind to have told you at all. I know I have stopped following bloggers whom I felt were ignoring their commenters, but I never bothered to tell them why. Perhaps if I had said something, they would have turned their blogs into chattier places and it would have worked out as win-win for everyone.